YEAR ZERO: or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Abandon Social Media
- Hendrik Gericke
- Jan 4
- 5 min read
The last few days, I have felt a sense of pleasant relief, then it occurs to me why this is. I have committed to getting rid of social media, which I am in the process of doing (this is not as simple as one might think, so I have detailed the process below). The most significant other time I have experienced this feeling, was years ago when I gave up drinking. I felt that same sense of lightness, of being unburdened and at the same time being given back a piece of my life that I didn’t realise I was missing. Like leaving a bad relationship.
Another time I had this feeling, was a few years ago when I went back to using a dumb phone. I didn’t entirely get rid of the smartphone, but it took a firm backseat (and remains at home, in a drawer). Making that shift again felt like a weight being lifted from my chest, not having this screen in your pocket, just itching to be checked.
The social media decision was a recent one that neatly coincided with the end of the year. In mid-December I had another road-to-Damascus moment of stress and frustration with the entire entangled notion of social media. I legitimately asked the questions a) ‘Do I need this?’ and b) ‘How would I cope without it?’
After some cursory research and my own pro-and-con list making, the decision was clear and final. There may be one or two difficulties, but the price of cutting ties with something I know in my bones to be no good does not really warrant too much consideration. From there it was a matter of simple planning and execution. How do I scale back and shut it down without losing my entire network of contacts?
Below I will break down the steps I took. 1: Realisation that this situation is not working for you. I believe this can only come from your gut or some other internal recognition, you cannot make someone reach this conclusion through external manipulation or coercion.
2: Decide that a change must be made. This is a crucial step and only requires that you make up your mind. It may be scary, but you can get there.
3: Take stock. I reviewed all my contacts on social media (FB and IG), both personal and pages I follow out of interest. I purged the frivolous connections (there will likely be MANY), which simplified the next step. It was a cumbersome process, but I managed to divide my contacts into sets as pages on a spreadsheet, personal contacts (people with whom I have a direct relationship) and follows (people or pages that I would like to keep track of as a fan). By getting rid of tenuous connections, I was able to distil what is important and worth maintaining, whether it be personal connections or artists (for example) that I’m interested in keeping an eye on.
4: Build a record. This is to extract all the relevant information needed before stepping away. Having made a tidy list of all contacts, I sent individual messages, explaining what I was doing and getting contact details outside social media. The response to these messages was a steady trickle across several days. Many people did not reply, which is bound to happen and not the end of the world. Others I contacted via direct means like text or WhatsApp. I also directed people to sign up for my newsletter via my site, which adds another avenue of communication. The end result was a robust document of contacts, allowing me to remain in contact without the convenient web of social media.
5: Drawdown. Once I had all the information salvaged from my social media profiles, I was comfortable letting it all go. This coincided neatly with the New Year, and when I woke up on January First, I was ready to pull the plug. That, it turns out, is easier said than done. I tried deleting my Instagram profile, but something is going wrong with my password reset emails being sent, so for the time being, my account is still active while I figure out a solution. (I refuse to waste too much time and energy on this, so the profile might be active indefinitely) Another step I took was getting rid of all my IG posts bar one or two. I will add a final note as a signpost explaining the situation and where to find me.
I have left my FB alone for now as the occasional message is still trickling in, but apart from checking these contact messages, I treat it as nonexistent. I have also buried these apps deep in my phone's menu, so they're not visible or easily accessible.
6: Move on and don’t look back. This is best part. Be free and get on with life in the real world, away from cheap dopamine.
7: What next? There is of course the legitimate question of how to proceed outside the Social Media ecosystem. Well, I’ll figure it out and write about it here. First, I intend to stick with direct communication (phone, email, etc), because that’s how I get most of my work anyway. Sure, Marketplace is handy, but I’ll let that go if it means not being burdened with every other intrusive feature these platforms bring with them.
An added challenge is that I intend to re-establish my personal art (I have been mainly freelancing for a decade) and doing so without social media is a clean slate for me to figure out. I relish the challenge and have faith in people more than any algorithm, let's go! The surprising part has been the positive response from people when I messaged them. There are two reasons for this: I have been having direct and real conversations (unlike I have in decades in some cases), finding out where people are, how they’re doing, asking questions and sharing your own life situation (you know, having a conversation). This does not happen in the same way on social media, because so much is done vicariously. We see what others post, and passively process it, or we see comments which cause all manner of internal responses. When you’re exchanging messages directly, you’re having a sincere interaction and that feels like something worth going back to.
The second surprise has been the amount of supportive messages I got for what I’m doing. A fair number agreed with me, but admitted were not ready yet, too deep, still too addicted. The upshot being that most expressed the desire to be free of this thing. I found it heartening. Having reached this point where a change was essential for me, I did really not know whether anybody else felt the same. I now know I am not alone and perhaps I can help others disentangle themselves.
Retaining our attention is the primary tool of these systems and I disagree with the inevitability of their dominance, so I took action and let it go.
If you would like to do the same, but you don’t know where to start, drop me a line.
Sincerely
Hendrik
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